Am I normal? NO

But I’m getting there….

I have started getting the bus to work since my car imploded on my driveway (damn you Jemima!) which I thought would stress me out entirely and cause me to dive headfirst into a packet of chips but I was proved wrong this morning when I found my journey to be quite pleasant. I have friends who would recoil in horror at me describing a journey on public transport as being pleasant but given it was a choice between bus and walking in the rain, the bus suited me just fine. I never used to ride on the top deck of the bus even if it meant I had to strap hang with my nose buried in the armpit of some sweaty stanky student as I was always worried about a) being able to fit up the narrow stairwell, b) taking up two seats when someone had schlepped upstairs in order to find a seat c) the bus driving off from my stop before I managed to make it downstairs again and d) falling down the stairs landing in a lardy pile at the bottom. Since being a bus dweller though I have ridden on the top deck several times, including sitting right at the front of the bus which made me want to retch as I could see where I was going and wasn’t in control….

Anyway this morning started like any other with me muscling to the front of the queue in order to try and get a seat [for the record I didn’t actually elbow anyone out of the way, I just edge towards where the bus stops as it ticks closer to it’s estimated arrival!], only to find a deserted bus with plenty of seats to go around. The ultimate test of my burgeoning normality came a few stops up the route where a woman got on and as she was paying for her ticket I could see her summing up where to sit whilst waiting for her change from the incredibly surly bus driver. I was astounded when she chose to come and sit next to me, even though there were still quite a few empty seats. The significance of it might pass a lot of you skinny mins by however for me it was like a chorus of cherubs had popped up from behind the driver and were singing a ditty just for moi. Given the choice between walking to the totally empty seats at the back, sitting next to the slightly mental woman behind me or squishing her tushy on to the seat next to me – she had chosen ME! And there was no squishing involved! I used to inwardly curse whenever someone tried valiantly to share a bus seat with me as a pre op mainly because I used to take up one and a half seats all on my own and would therefore have to contort myself to stop my seat buddy from being shoved off into the aisle and bouncing down towards the doors. This morning I still had to do a bit of elbow tucking so that if the bus jolted I wouldn’t smack her in the face but other than that it was quite comfortable. A flipping revelation!

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