Barter Jarter…

Oh okay so that doesn’t work as a title but I wanted to come up with my own ‘Swagger Jagger’ type catchy catchphrase (FYI I am in love with that song and like to do the rap bits in the car and make a face like an angry duck which is what I like to imagine Princess Cher of Lloyd doing when she’s on her own. I also do the fist bumpy thing and the shoulder brushy thing that the cool kids do). (Yes, I’m a twat).

So the no shopping thing continues and I’m watching my brain slowly cope with not being able to flex the Visa whenever it has a problem which is interesting to say the least. I’m a little bit bonkers, case in point being finding the new IKEA catalogue on my shelf in the fridge, I’m a little bit frightened, I checked my bank balance and panicked I didn’t have enough money to last me the month that I begin stopping shopping (WTF?) and I’m a little bit excited about the new world opening up for me. Yes ladies and gents that’s right, I went to Poundland!

I had been in town for an appointment and was walking past to get back to the car when I realised I needed some new shampoo so on a whim I decided to nip in and buy a whole bottle for ONE ENGLISH POUND. It was a bloody revelation especially as I managed to get some that is formulated for brunette hair and promises to make it vibrant. Of course it might make it vibrant but no longer attached to my head which is a worry but in for a penny in for a pound (quite literally). I could have gone on a rampage in there buying all sorts of shit that I’d never use but I didn’t need any of it so I didn’t bother. I had a mooch and a browse to see what goodies I might be able to pick up there when I do actually need things and then skipped home swinging my bottle of hundred pennies shampoo merrily.

Continuing the hair theme, last weekend I also bartered for a haircut with a lovely friend who is a whizz with the scissors as my hair was starting to look like an experiment at the Playdoh mop top hair shop. To be honest she could have hacked at it with some secateurs and it couldn’t have looked much worse. In exchange for a cut and chat I am going to spend an evening of her choice looking after her little boy so that she and hubs can escape for some grown up time. What she doesn’t know is that I properly enjoy spending time with him and would have offered to have him without her going near my bonce with her mad skillz yo.

Also, does the rap bit in Swagger Jagger remind anyone else of the Mathlete rap that Kevin G does in ‘Mean Girls’? No? Just me? Okay.

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