Ooh What A Lovely Pear

Having recently discovered my dress mojo and spent a week flouncing about in a variety of outfits swishing my skirts and generally acting like I was in some sort of Jane Austen book the heavens then opened and I couldn’t slink round in a series of summer dresses anymore so retreated back to the comfort of my jeans. Also three dresses and a skirt in four days was more than enough for my legs, slow and steady wins the race and all that so it was nice for them to go back to their denim haven.

If you know me though you’ll know that jeans don’t fit me. They resolutely fall down because there is a lot of junk in my trunk and I have a teeny waist. This means I have to buy jeans to fit my arse and thighs and this makes them baggy as sin round my waist leaving me hoicking them up whenever I stand up and flashing my Dagenham smile when I sit down. It’s not a good look and as someone who really doesn’t like wearing belts I needed a solution before I was arrested for indecent exposure

Enter Evans the shop I always hated, hated because it was the only shop I could frequent and at the end I couldn’t even fit their clothes. Today they changed my life* with a pair of pear jeans. Evans have been pushing the idea of finding your body shape and dressing accordingly and so their shops are plastered with style advice and tips to help you navigate your way in store. Having used their online body shape calculator I found out I am a “pear” with 15″ difference between my waist and my hips – that seems like an overly large scary number and a definite reason to pound the treadmill – and so was intrigued by their jeans specifically designed for women like me who have a booty to rival Kim Kardashian.

Cut smaller and higher on the waist to hug your curves, they claim that the new magic shape will change your life and might also make you drop down a dress size. They’re not wrong. Having grabbed a size smaller than I currently wear I was definitely holding my breath as I pulled them on. It felt like there was no chance in hell of them fitting but oh my goodness they fit like a dream. No baggy waistline, no butt crack on show, no yanking them up, no muffin top, it’s like they were designed for me.

If you’re blessed in the curves department like me then I can’t recommend these jeans highly enough. Sure the product photo is pretty horrific as it looks like the Pilsbury Dough Boy has been squeezed into them but they have magical properties and they’re only £22. Bargain.

*probably an exaggeration but I heard cherubs singing in the changing rooms, honest.

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