The last time the Linley-Muns were all together in penguin suits was ahem years ago on my 18th birthday when we got all gussied up for the Miracles Valentines Ball. We’ll gloss over the fact that my date for the evening ditched me for my friend but it’s okay folks, he bought me the cassette of “If I Could Turn Back The Hands of Time” by R Kelly to make it up to me so thanks, whatever your name was. I remember your six pack and your eyebrows like Sam Eagle from The Muppets but your name escapes me.
Must have been love…
On Saturday after belated Christmas and birthday present swapping we bombed into the spa and whiled away time in the hot tub, playing sea monsters, and making sure diddy dot Nancy didn’t swallow all of the pool water whilst ‘wimming. After a lightning fast makeover with enough contour to rival Kim Kardashian, a pair of fat pants, and a hoick of Mary-Kate and Ashley to their rightful place up under my chin we slid into our chariot for the night – my resplendently filthy Yaris Hybrid complete with a massive dent in the bumper – and headed up to the main house to re-run the fun at the 21st annual Miracles Goodwood ball.
You can’t help but have that jaw dropping sense of “woah” when you see Goodwood House loom into view. Even if you know nothing about architecture (me) or embarrassingly little about history (also me) the hairs on the back of your neck will stand up when you round the corner on her. After guzzling a few glasses of fizz (not me, I was on call) and having a punt on the tombola, the Second Butler came and offered us the chance to go through the door marked ‘no entry’ to see the two Canaletto paintings of London produced in 1747, and the Don Quixote tapestries. Being allowed to slip away into the quiet of the ‘old house’ from the buzz of the party felt really special, one of those moments that will stick in the memory banks.
After the most delicious dinner it was time for the part of the evening I had secretly been dreading, THE AUCTION – click that link to relive the 2011 ball, aka teddybeargate. Thank heavens for being on call and therefore not totally boozed out of my box and so I made it through unscathed without spending a ridiculous amount of money on something ridiculous. Phew. A flutter at the casino, a go on the giant Scalextric track and a healthy dose of setting the world to rights over several mine swept bottles of wine (again, not me) and it was time to trip the light fantastic back to the car and head back to the hotel. Via the Goodwood Hill Climb route. In my Hybrid’s electric mode at 10 miles an hour.