Hello… Is It Me You’re Looking For?

Longtime readers will know I sometimes take little breaks from this whole shebang. I once tried to make a portmanteau of “blogging” and “holiday” and came up with “bloliday” which is quite possibly the worst word in the history of the universe.

Anyway, writing furiously and then taking my foot clean off the gas for a while is just what I do. This little mini break is a LOT shorter than the last which lasted a couple of years so you should all feel incredibly grateful. Feel free to kiss my feet. 

But where have I been? 

Well I’ve been being sick. A lot. 

It’s not a new thing and it’s terribly boring and if you’ve ever been out for a meal with me over the past ooh… four years (?) then I’m afraid to tell you I’ve been sick after it. 

As I said to my surgeon yesterday I have been sick in some fancy, and some weird, places. 

Royal Ascot – ✔️

Henley Regatta – ✔️

The Royal Suite of a posh hotel – ✔️

Into my own handbag – ✔️

All over myself whilst doing 60mph in my car – ✔️ 

Into a fruitbowl during the speeches at the wedding of some dear friends – ✔️

The list goes on. And on. And Ariston. 

It’s bloody boring and if I’d saved the money I’d spent on lovely meals out only to then horf it back up again I’d have my own private island right about now. 

So I finally got off my slack arse and contacted my wonderful surgeon, Mr S. I saw him yesterday and we came up with a plan. Sadly it involves yet more surgery but if it means I can start living normally again then I am here for that shit. 

In a twist of ‘isn’t the NHS simply brilliant’ fate my wonderfully talented brilliant bastard of a friend Adam has written a book about his six years hard labour at the coalface of it. You can buy it here and you really should. I read it in one emotional rollercoaster of a sitting, I laughed, I cried, I laughed while crying, and the ending gave me goosebumps and I had to have a little quiet sit to let it sink in. 

God bless the NHS. 


8 thoughts on “Hello… Is It Me You’re Looking For?

  1. 1.) “bloliday” might be the best word I’ve ever heard. 2.) More surgeries=( It is both terrible that you need them and wonderful that you have access to them. Here in the US of A if you break your arm…you might legit lose your house 3.) I wish you oodles of health and prosperity and hope this surgery is the last of them! ❤❤❤❤

    1. Haha Bloliday makes me think of, well, blow jobs! I feel so so grateful for the NHS, sure I paid about $200 to bypass the NHS waiting lists to see the surgeon (top in his field) but then he’s switched me back to NHS for treatment. It genuinely scares me that we might lose it, we hear horror stories from the US all the time about people being bankrupted from medical bills. It’s awful.

      Thanks for the good wishes, I know I’m in the best hands possible 🙂 xx

  2. Oh no that list… I thought it was so funny and then realized that I’m such a dick for laughing at your misfortune LOL sorry girl! Fingers crossed that this surgery is the one to fix all the issues!

    1. Oh god, do not apologise at ALL. I regularly laugh at some of the situations I’ve been sick in. My personal favourite was having to sneak off to puke on a date. Not realising that the bathrooms were unisex and my date had decided to nip for a pee so heard me chucking my guts up. OH DEAR!! hahaha. x

      1. Ahhh no! What did you say? I was just listening to a podcast about a gal who anxiety barfs on dates. She did an update a year or so later, still single LOL

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